Not a Green Thumb

I was drawn to an article on cnn.com:

Houseplants So Low Maintenance Even You (Probably) Won't Kill Them
Posted by Brad Tuttle Tuesday, November 3, 2009 at 5:46 pm
Who needs a high-maintenance houseplant? If you're going through the trouble of decorating your home with some greenery, it makes sense to buy something that'll last—even if your home is as dark as a basement, your ability to remember to water is nearly nonexistent, and your thumbs aren't remotely green.
Among some suggestions for "No-Fail Houseplants" are Pothos and Spath:

- Pothos: This leafy, versatile houseplant can endure two of the biggest plant maintenance no-nos for extended periods of time: Low light and low water levels.

- Spath: This hardy, leafy dark green plant has long skinny stems with a spike of itsy-bitsy white micro flower at its tips. It thrives in low light and it actually hangs onto water for weeks before drooping leaves signal that it's time for a swig.

Tried both. Killed both. Chia pets don't even grow under my care.

My idea of inside greenery: fake. The kind you buy and never have to water and throw them out when they collect too much dust.

Outside: no mess - no bother - no planting - they come up all on their own every year - things like tulips, hostas, flowering bushes, etc. Husband plants a vegetable garden every year filled with the things we like and I use for cooking. He is in charge of it - I don't even look at anything but the produce for fear of killing it. Oh and I leave the watering to my husband. The outside looks nice. The inside looks nice too - just nothing live except the animals and humans.